Sex toys can’t replace the intimate, skin-to-skin contact with someone you desire, but sometimes it does come close. What’s better than combining the two and partake in a threesome with an electronic vibrating friend?
Whether you’re about to bring up this topic to your partner or already enjoying the double pleasure, here’s why using couples sex toys will give your love life a makeover. Read on for the 6 best positions that work best with toys and take you and your partner to planet orgasm in no time.
OMG! Am I being replaced?
Fear of being replaced is often the main concern of someone whose partner has purchased a sex toy. Rest assured, there is no replacement for live, human contact! Toys are sexual enhancements, like chocolate sauce on ice cream. Sex toys can be used in ways to increase connection and add to the partnered experience.
So often, couples assume that their partners will not like the idea of using couples sex toys, therefore never bring up the topic. They are afraid of being seen as perverts or being rejected, but many people find that when they get brave enough to discuss toys, their partners are totally on board.
Did you know that many couples use sex toys routinely in their sexual activities? A recent study¹ found that 46-66% of people between the ages of 18-55 reported using sex toys with their partners, with the 35-44 age group reporting the most toy use. Additionally, at least one person used toys in solo-play in over 50% of the couples.
There must be a reason why sex toys are popular – actually, our certified sex experts say there are 10! Here are the top 10 benefits of using couples sex toys:
10 Benefits of Using Couples Sex Toys
1. Vibrators deliver pleasure. If your partner is happy, you will likely be happy too!
2. Good sex experienced with sex toys increases libido.
3. Couples sex toys get people out of performance mode and into pleasure mode.
4. Adding something new to couple’s sex life prevents boredom. The novelty of using a sex toy activates dopamine receptors- making sex exciting again.
5. A sex toy can be used for show and tell (show your partner how you like it), which is an additional way to add new excitement in the bedroom.
6. Especially for women who need clitoral stimulation to orgasm (which is most), a vibrating sex toy can ensure orgasms during intercourse.
7. Vibration-induced orgasms are often more intense, which feels good on penises during intercourse. Additionally, vibration used on or near the clitoris can be felt through the vaginal wall, offering a new sensation for the partner.
8. Female orgasms often happen quicker with the stimulation of a sex toy, which can even-up the discrepancy between the time it takes men and women to orgasm (average time for men to experience orgasm is 3-5 minutes, while women are slower, averaging 20 minutes).
9. A sex toy’s vibrations can save tired mouths and fingers.
10. When used as a body massager, a wand-type sex toy is an amazing warm-up to sex. It is especially good for women who need to relax and de-stress before getting in the mood.
Brownie points – The happiest couples say that good communication is the most fulfilling thing about their relationship. When couples open up communication by talking about sex and sex toys (one of the most difficult topics to discuss), their communication will also improve in other areas of their lives.
Suggestions
If you’d like to use a wand to increase the connection with your partner, try using it as a body massager first. Practise asking for and giving pleasure with a body massage, and when comfortable, continue this communication while using the wand to stimulate the erotic zones. By paying attention to how your partner responds, you will also become more in tune with their nonverbal cues. Sharing is caring – experience the pleasure together will make you feel closer!
Position guide to using couples sex toys
The design of Le Wand, a rechargeable vibrating wand massager, makes it an excellent tool to use during partner-play. Since it is cordless, it can be used almost anywhere (except for in water). It also fits well in wand toy mounts which enables hands-free fun.
Here are the best 6 position ideas to get you started:
1. Standing
2. Side-lying/ spooning
3. Doggy style
4. Woman on top
5. Dual action – partner fingering while Le Wand stimulates the clitoris
6. Dual action – self-stimulation using a wedge while giving oral to your partner
¹ The Normal Bar by Chrisanna Northrup. Pepper Schwartz, PhD. James Witte, PhD. pg 86